10 times Melania Trump broke White House traditions and defied expectations of the first lady role

• As first lady, Melania Trump remained an enigmatic figure and strayed from White House traditions.

• She didn’t move to the White House right away in 2016 and arrived at events separately from Trump.

• She didn’t invite Jill Biden to the White House in 2020 and declined her invitation in 2024.

In many ways, Melania Trump was a traditional first lady. She wore a ball gown to the inauguration and donated it to the National Museum of American History’s “First Ladies” exhibit. She took up the cause of children’s wellness with her “Be Best” campaign. She led White House restoration projects, renovating the Rose Garden and designing a new rug for the Diplomatic Reception Room.

However, the fiercely private first lady also remained something of an enigma and made the role her own by straying from presidential protocol and long-held White House traditions.

Melania Trump will once again serve as FLOTUS when President-elect Donald Trump is inaugurated for his second, non-consecutive term in January. Having been largely absent from the 2024 campaign trail, her level of White House involvement remains to be seen.

Here’s how Melania Trump has defied expectations as first lady thus far.

The Office of Melania Trump and representatives for the Trump transition team did not immediately respond to a request for comment.

Melania Trump made occasional appearances during Trump’s presidential campaigns but largely remained out of the spotlight.

First ladies often act as representatives of their husbands’ campaigns, traveling the country to deliver speeches and meet voters at events. During all of Trump’s presidential campaigns, Melania was noticeably absent, making only occasional appearances.

The New York Times reported in 2023 that while Melania Trump privately supported Donald Trump’s 2024 campaign, she rejected his offers to campaign with him.

When asked about Melania Trump’s absence, Donald Trump told “Meet the Press” in 2023 that he likes to keep her away from the campaign trail because “it’s so nasty and so mean.”

“She’s a private person, a great person, a very confident person, and she loves our country very much,” he said of his wife.

When Donald Trump was first elected in 2016, Melania Trump didn’t move into the White House right away.

While Donald Trump moved into the White House after the inauguration, he told reporters that Melania Trump stayed behind in New York with their then-10-year-old son, Barron Trump, so that he could finish out the school year.

Washington Post reporter Mary Jordan wrote in her book, “The Art of Her Deal: The Untold Story of Melania Trump,” that Melania Trump also used the time to renegotiate her prenuptial agreement.

In 2018, Melania Trump arrived at the State of the Union address in a separate motorcade after news broke of Donald Trump’s alleged affair with porn star Stormy Daniels.

In January 2018, The Wall Street Journal broke the news that one of Donald Trump’s lawyers, Michael Cohen, transferred a $130,000 hush-money payment to adult film star Stormy Daniels ahead of the 2016 election to keep her from speaking about their alleged 2006 affair.

After reports emerged of Donald Trump’s alleged affair, which he denied, Melania Trump backed out of a trip to Switzerland and other public engagements. She also arrived at the 2018 State of the Union address in a separate motorcade in a break from the tradition of presidents and their spouses arriving together.

Melania Trump’s then-director of communications, Stephanie Grisham, said that the then-first lady did not travel with her husband because she was accompanying the guests of honor, the BBC reported.

Donald Trump was later found guilty on all 34 counts of falsifying business records to cover up the payment to Daniels. After the hush-money trial reached its verdict in May, Donald Trump continued to deny the affair and called the trial a “witch hunt.”

Melania Trump broke protocol again weeks later by arriving at Marine One separately from Donald Trump.

After The New Yorker published a report detailing a former Playmate’s alleged affair with Donald Trump, which he denied took place, Melania Trump once again did not appear publicly by her husband’s side.

Instead of taking the traditional walk with Donald Trump across the White House lawn, she arrived at the presidential helicopter in a separate vehicle.

“With her schedule, it was easier to meet him on the plane,” Grisham told CNN of Melania Trump’s separate route.

Melania Trump’s White House Christmas decorations broke the mold of traditional holiday decor.

For her first Christmas in the White House in 2017, Melania Trump lined the East Colonnade with bare white branches that cast shadows on the hall. In 2018, she filled the East Colonnade with dark-red trees that garnered comparisons to costumes in the dystopian TV series “The Handmaid’s Tale.” The following year, clear acrylic panels lined the hall, and her final White House Christmas featured potted plants.

Her avant-garde Christmas decorations garnered some criticism, while others praised her unconventional choices.

“Everyone has a different taste,” Melania said of the critical responses to her Christmas decorations at a town hall event hosted by Liberty University in 2018.

In a speech at the First Baptist Church in Dallas in 2021, Donald Trump said that Melania Trump “didn’t get exactly a fair shake” when it came to her Christmas decor choices.

“She would make the most beautiful Christmas decorations,” he said. “And I remember she made these magnificent red trees, and the media said, ‘Oh, that’s terrible.'”

While first ladies have long used clothing to send subtle messages, Melania Trump’s “I really don’t care, do u?” jacket was more overt.

Throughout US history, first ladies have chosen outfits with deeper meanings that reflect their values. Laura Bush wore red to help bring awareness to the dangers of heart disease. Michelle Obama chose to highlight up-and-coming designers from underrepresented backgrounds. Jill Biden appeared at campaign events wearing boots emblazoned with the word “vote.”

Melania Trump’s “I really don’t care, do u?” jacket, worn while traveling to visit immigrant children at the US-Mexico border in 2018, was an unusually combative wardrobe choice for a first lady.

Melania Trump wrote in her 2024 memoir that her press secretary wouldn’t let her clarify that the jacket’s message was directed at the media.

“The media claimed the jacket meant I did not care about the children or the border, which was clearly not true,” she wrote.

When Joe Biden won the 2020 election, she didn’t invite Jill Biden to the White House as Michelle Obama had done for her.

After Donald Trump won the 2016 election, the Obamas hosted the Trumps at the White House in a long-held tradition ensuring a smooth transition of power.

While Barack Obama and Donald Trump met in the Oval Office, Michelle Obama hosted Melania Trump for tea in the Yellow Oval Room and discussed raising children in the White House.

When Donald Trump lost the 2020 election, he refused to concede and did not invite the Bidens to visit the White House ahead of the inauguration.

The Trumps skipped Joe Biden’s inauguration, opting to fly to Mar-a-Lago instead.

Outgoing presidents and first ladies have traditionally attended presidential inaugurations even after painful defeats.

Upon leaving the White House, Donald Trump and Melania Trump skipped Joe Biden’s inauguration, held their own farewell ceremony at Andrews Air Force Base, and flew to their Palm Beach home.

Unlike previous years, she attended only the last day of the 2024 Republican National Convention and did not deliver a speech.

Melania Trump previously delivered speeches at the 2016 and 2020 conventions. In 2024, she only attended the final day of the Republican National Convention and did not speak.

After Donald Trump won the 2024 election, Melania Trump declined Jill Biden’s invitation for tea at the White House, citing a scheduling conflict with her book tour.

Donald Trump accepted Joe Biden’s invitation to meet at the White House as part of Joe Biden’s pledge to ensure a peaceful transfer of power. However, Melania Trump turned down the first lady’s offer to meet for tea.

“Mrs. Trump will not be attending today’s meeting at the White House,” Melania Trump’s office wrote in a statement on X. “Her husband’s return to the Oval Office to commence the transition process is encouraging, and she wishes him great success. In this instance, several unnamed sources in the media continue to provide false, misleading, and inaccurate information. Be discerning with your source of news.”

It remains unclear if Melania will live at the White House during Trump’s second term. CNN reported that she is “unlikely” to live there full time.

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