Run ’em up and fill ’em in.
It will be a far cry from Disney On Ice at UBS Arena on Wednesday, as the cast of the irreverent Canadian hockey TV series “Shoresy” lace up their skates for a grit-filled battle against some legendary Islanders alum — including Benoit Hogue, Josh Bailey, Cal Clutterbuck and Matt Martin.
“I’m sure they want to beat us, being former NHL guys, and I think we want to do the same thing,” Hogue told The Post.
“I don’t know if my speed is going to be there, but every time I compete in something, I’m going to try to do my best and try to win,” the 59-year-old Stanley Cup champion added.
The 100% Rotten Tomatoes-rated cult classic about a small-town Ontario team on the verge of folding — it stars several ex-pros — has become such a hit that fans last year demanded to see the real thing played out in their hometowns, all to the shock of its own actors.
“I was just happy to have a job,” said Terry Ryan, who plays funny-talking forward Ted Hitchcock, adding that it’s “surreal” to see fans wear fictional Sudbury Blueberry Bulldog jerseys at events like Islanders games.
“I really didn’t see it becoming such a worldwide thing — maybe Canadian,” added Ryan, a confessed “first-round nothing” and “NHL footnote,” who played briefly for the Montreal Canadiens in the ’90s.
Nowadays, Ryan joins creator and actor Jared Keeso — better known as the legendary, foul-mouthed player Shoresy himself — along with other cast members on a North American tour to go toe-to-toe with hardened NHL alumni in hockey towns like Detroit, Boston and Toronto.
“I never thought I’d be playing in front of thousands of people again, let alone selling out National Hockey League arenas,” Ryan said of the “Shoresy Classic” circuit that has also made stops in Los Angeles and Edmonton.
“Playing hockey games wasn’t part of this show’s plan,” he added. “So it’s wild, it’s fun that we get to do what we always loved to do.”
It’s also a walk down memory lane as lots of the “Shoresy” cast have stories about the organizations they’re facing off against — such as Ryan’s interesting interview with the Isles ahead of the 1995 draft.
He recalled then-general manager Mike Milbury asking what Ryan would do if he met a girl 10 minutes before the team’s curfew.
Ryan’s answer was to sleep with her for five minutes and make it back on time.
“I figured maybe he could take a joke,” Ryan laughed.
“And I knew he wasn’t going to pick me … so there was a chance for me to spread my creative wings in that meeting.”
Set the tone
What isn’t so funny is who the “Shoresy” roster — which includes former minor leaguer-turned-rapper Jonathan Diaby, known on the show as “Dolo” — is facing Wednesday night.
The Islanders alumni team, coached by six-time Stanley Cup winner Brian Trottier and playoff penalty shot hero Shawn Bates, also skates out Matt Moulson, Johnny Boychuk, Thomas Griess and enforcers Steve Webb and Eric Cairns.
“Hopefully the young guys can make the plays, and I can just stand somewhere and get the puck, and then hopefully I get an empty netter,” joked Hogue.
As for the “Shoresy” side, former Islanders coach Ted Nolan’s sons, ex-NHLers Brandon Nolan and Jordan Nolan are preparing to suit up. The brothers play two characters, both named Jim on the show, who have a reputation for setting the tone with fisticuffs and brutal on-ice behavior.
Whether the Nolans or anyone else decides to duke it out in the game, “we’ll see what happens,” said Ryan, who added his squad is ready to hang with the best of them.
“Everybody stays busy, stays in shape,” added Diaby, who grew up playing with the Islanders’ Anthony Duclair and against Jonathan Drouin.
“We’re still able to move, and the legs are still good.”
If things get physical, Hogue and his bunch are ready for that, too.
“I’m sure there’s going to be a little bumping out there,” added Hogue, who started watching the show after deciding to play in the game.
“But I’m fine with that.”
Shoresy is streaming on Hulu in the US.
