An Australian mother has slammed a doctor over his behavior at her six-week postpartum appointment.
Shelley Gray, a Queensland mom of two, and pediatric nutritionist, says her expectations were completely reasonable.
“I thought the appointment would be about me and how my physical and mental health was going since giving birth just six weeks ago,” she told Kidspot.
But that’s not what happened.
“My husband needs to be looked after”
“I got one question asking how I was going,” she revealed.
“The remainder of the appointment was spent with the doctor asking me which birth control I wanted.”
Shocked, the mom of two took to TikTok to share her frustration.
She revealed the doctor’s primary concern wasn’t her recovery—it was her husband and how he was coping with a newborn.
“He didn’t have a look at my tear and see how it was healing, didn’t even touch my stomach to see how everything was going,” she said.
Despite Shelley being his patient, she felt she wasn’t the doctor’s focus.
“He told me I should go on birth control, as I shouldn’t get pregnant again so soon. That my husband needs to be looked after,” she revealed.
“It was completely inappropriate, basically telling me I need to ‘service my husband’ and get back to our sexual relationship soon to help relieve his stress, with very little regard to whether I am ready for that after giving birth.”
She was stunned.
“I was shocked and in disbelief. After some time reflecting I got angry about it. Not just for me, but for how many women would be experiencing conversations like that.”
“I only see female doctors”
While Shelley acknowledges that the mental health of dads matters, she argues there’s a time and place for that conversation—and it’s not during a mother’s first postpartum check-up.
“I think support is needed for fathers, and maybe they should be encouraged to have their own checkups,” she argues.
“But we need to ensure that women feel supported at these checkups and can get referrals to the correct supports.”
Shelley’s TikTok struck a nerve.
“And THIS is why I only see female doctors,” one viewer responded.
“I’m sorry this was your experience. You 100% deserved better,” another said.
Others shared similar stories.
“I feel like this care is standard. My doctor never checked my scar,” a mom shared.
“Omg I had this exact experience!” another revealed.
