She’s saying, “I don’t.”
A bridesmaid was gobsmacked after her friend, the bride, asked her to pay a hefty fee to be a part of the bridal party, making the bridesmaid not want to participate in the wedding at all.
The anonymous 24-year-old woman took to Reddit in a since-deleted post to detail her predicament, saying that she was “beyond excited and honored” to be a part of the special day for her friend, Megan.
Then, “things took a turn.”
“A couple of weeks after the proposal, Megan sent me an email detailing the ‘bridesmaid package,’” the woman wrote on Reddit, People reported. “She attached a spreadsheet showing what I would need to pay for in order to participate.”
The expenses included $500 for the dress, $300 for hair and makeup, $150 minimum for a bridal gift and a $100 deposit for the bachelorette party at a luxury resort.
“And then, to top it off, she asked for an extra $50 for ‘miscellaneous expenses,’ which I still can’t figure out,” the disgruntled bridesmaid wrote.
When she confronted Meghan about the eye-watering costs and expressed her concern that it was “too much money” for her to afford, Meghan claimed it was “the norm.”
“She said, ‘I’m just trying to make sure everything’s perfect, and these costs are necessary,’” the Redditor wrote. “She even said, ‘If you can’t afford to be in my wedding, I understand, but I can’t change the plans for everyone else.’”
The discussion made the bridesmaid feel “super awkward.”
“I’ve always been there for her, but this just feels like she’s using her wedding as an excuse to make her guests pay for her dream day,” she said, adding that the bride hasn’t spoken to her since the conversation.
“I understand that weddings can be expensive, but charging people to be in your wedding, especially your best friend, feels wrong to me.”
While some of her friends argued that she should just cough up the cash to smooth things over with the bride, others said she should “stand my ground” and refuse to pay.
Obviously torn about what to do, the bridesmaid asked Reddit if she would be in the wrong for refusing to attend the nuptials.
“If you can’t afford it, you can’t afford it. You can simply say, I love you and thank you for asking me to be in your wedding but I will have to decline due to financial constraints. I would still love to attend and support you,” one commenter wrote.
“If she is really your friend she will understand, but you may have to let things happen based on her response.”
Another user called the bride “money hungry,” while someone else said it was “way too much to ask from a friend.”
“Being a bridesmaid isn’t a subscription service,” one person chimed in. “If she wants a fundraiser, she should start a GoFundMe, not charge admission to her wedding party.”
“If she’s really your bff she’d understand that what she’s asking of you & the rest of the bridal party is too much,” commented another who called Meghan a “bridezilla.”
“She’s asking you & everyone else to pay roughly $1,100 to be in her wedding. That’s not a friend.”
